I don’t have a mustache, pince nez on my nose, a leather couch, or a box of Kleenex for my “patients” but Sigmund Freud notwithstanding sometimes I feel an awful lot like a practicing dog psychoanalyst.
After all, there ARE a few similarities. The dogs that I work with are:
Stressed
Anxious
Overwhelmed
Confused
Just like people.
Many seem to have some of the same emotional disorders, albeit the canine version:
♦ Attention deficit disorder (some Jack Russells seem to be born with this)
♦ Obsessive compulsiveness (for example, a Cattle dog + frisbee, or a Labrador + tennis ball)
♦ Anger management problems (I met a Golden Retriever, of all breeds, that wouldn’t let anyone into the house)
♦ Split personality (that sweet Yorkie that turns into a terror when the doorbell rings)
♦ Mania (any dog having a puppy fit)
♦ Hysteria (have you ever witnessed a dog with a thunderstorm phobia?)
A typical therapy session might go like this:
Reagan (a 3 year old Terrier mix): Dr. B, sometimes I feel so empty and lost. No one seems to understand me.
Dr. B: Hmmm. So are you saying that your family ignores you?
Reagan: Oh no, they don’t ignore me at all. That’s just it. I can’t walk by them without getting kissed and hugged and petted and squeezed. I’m like a toy to them. They never leave me alone.
Dr. B: Have you ever told them how you feel?
Reagan: Yes, Dr. I’ve tried everything. I run away from them. I growl at them. Once, I even snapped at the littlest one because she wouldn’t stop rubbing me and I didn’t want to be touched any more. Yesterday, I gave her a little nip with my front teeth, just a tiny pinch, to get her to stop, and that’s when they sent me to see you.
Dr. B: I see. Tell me, if you could explain to your family what you want them to do – in their language – what would you say?
Reagan: I would say “Listen, I’m not a stuffed animal!” I don’t always want to be handled, just like sometimes you don’t want to be touched.”
Dr. B: Good, good. I like the way you phrased that. What else would you tell them?
Reagan: Wow, this is really freeing. I’d love to tell them not to pick me up. I like having my feet on the ground, not up high. And just because I look like I want attention doesn’t mean I should get it every time. Otherwise, I’ll get even more demanding and bratty.
Dr. B: Wait a minute. You ask for attention, but you shouldn’t get it?? Are you saying that sometimes you contradict yourself?
Reagan: Doesn’t everyone?
Dr. B: You’re so right. Well, it appears that our time is up.
Reagan: So soon? I was just getting comfy on your sofa.
Dr. B: See you next week.
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